Some mind-boggling things.. Studying + work (i.e. TA laboring) is still there as usual, and I have grown to ignore some of them :P
Just have been left hanging with some internship results for three weeks now, the most agonizing three weeks - because the recruiter told me I passed the first round, which is just enough of a great news to make me hope for more... I want this internship so so bad and it is literally driving me nuts. I think I want it more than I wanted to come to UIUC or to US. Well, nothing I can do except for waiting and checking my email every blink of an eye.
So far, 6 interviews: 1 offer (declined), 3 still waiting, 2 rejected.
And all the job searching lead me to think of what I'll be doing after graduation - still have 1.5 semesters to go but time seems to fly faster and faster these days - I've talked about it with several friends and family, and the problem boils down to whether I want to stay here or go back to southern hemisphere. It is kind of a big decision and I have no intention of making up my mind now and sticking to it no matter what... so in short, what's bugging me is really really not knowing what's gonna happen and what I'll end up deciding. Sure, life's no guarantee, but for some reason I have a nudging pressure that I don't want to waste time after I graduate... go if I want to go, stay if I want to stay, and not jumping all over the place. I think part of pressure comes from getting older (O-M-G) and seeing close friends getting married off and buying a home and settling down etc etc... all of which seem still quite far-away things for me (mainly because I am not mature enough '_'a).
On one hand, I'm already here, and "here" is definitely bigger than back home, and I should challenge myself in this bigger place while I'm young and able. On the other hand, the reason why people work so hard and become a working machine is to afford certain quality of lifestyle - which we have heaps back home.
One interviewer asked me "So you want to stay in US after graduation?" which was kind of a duhh question seeing how I was interviewing for a position in US location... but that made me think "well, do I? ermmm I don't know...." (didn't say that to the interviewer of course :D). Right now it depends on the job I find I guess. And at least I know that if I decide to go back, I'm gonna head to Melbourne or Sydney...
Uggh I'll have more time to think these more important things AFTER I finish my thesis... C/C++ is killing me!
